My Life According to a Bitchy Cat

So, I recieved a little bit of a shock, because it turns out my six month old cat is in heat. It caught me by surprise, because I hadn't realized that cats mature at six months. The thing is, now my loving cat has turned into a bitchy hormone crazed creature who sits at the window and meows  all night long trying to attract the males in the neighborhood. It reminded me of what it was like for me to go through the change of becoming an adult. Thinking back, I have changed so much over the years. We all do, of course, but looking back it's almost shocking to see how much I've changed. From an insecure gangly kid who always walked with her head down, to the beautiful strong woman I am today. Thinking back, I remembered some situations that, when I was going through them, seemed like the worst thing that could possibly happen, but now I can see were what made me as strong as I am today.
I had a rough childhood. I'm not going to go into a lot of detail, but I've been through some shit. Growing up in a world where I was ugly, where I was different, where I was a stereotype. My mother never showed me true affection, and I was always pushed to the side. I was exploited and used for financial gain, I was beaten, and worked like a horse, I was locked away for years. But through all of it, I survived, and became more powerful than anyone thought I could be. And thinking back, I wouldn't change a thing. My life has been a struggle so far, and it will continue to be a struggle until the day I die. I have no regrets, and I have learned from all of my pain.  I am SUPERWOMAN.
I guess you're wondering how I got all of this from a bitchy cat. Honestly I have no idea lol. I guess because of the abstract way my mind works.
Also marijuana.
C'est La Vie
Viva La Vida
And Fuck the System
Peace
Signed, Esther Dolezal ♪♫

Bath Day

So, I'm going to do like the internet, and write a post about my cat. Cringe if you must, but come on. We all knew this post was coming. The inevitable pet post.
Today was bath day. As you can see in the picture, my cat Sugar looks like she wants to kill me.
I truly hate bathing cats. They hate it just as much, and it doesn't help that cats have claws. And that they're slippery when wet. It also didn't help that as soon as she was lathered up, Sugar decided to squirm out of my hands, and take off running through the house splashing water and soap suds everywhere. Which naturally I slipped in and face planted while I was trying to catch her. I ended up slipping a lot today, because she left a slippery trail of soap behind her everywhere she ran, so in order to catch her I had to follow the trail of sudsy death.
I finally managed to corner her after about 10 minutes of running and slipping and falling, but when I went to pick her up she whipped those claws out and proceeded to shred my arm.
At about that time. I went and put on protective gear (a thick leather jacket, and knee pads) and tackled her.
I finally got her clean but the house is still a wreck. This was about five hours ago, and I've been cleaning almost non stop.
Thank God for wine.

C'est la Vie.
Viva la Vida.
And Fuck the System.
Peace.
Signed, Esther Dolezal 🎵🎶

Wish They Would Read.

I love libraries.

Specifically, I love the way people act at libraries. 

Everyone whispering, tiptoeing, to make sure not to infuriate the ancient librarian who, somehow, has hawk-like hearing. 

I love seeing children engrossed in books, turning pages, and actually giggling because their book is funny. 

Call me weird, but I'm the type of person who would rather spend the day at the library hunkered down in a quiet corner with a book and spend hours in my imagination. 

I mean social media is fun and all, but there's only so long I can look at memes before I start getting a headache.

It truly makes me sad to see children who don't read. Or play outside. Or imagine anything. I hate to see kids sitting around all day staring at screens. I hate seeing groups of college students sitting together in groups, each engrossed in their phone, and completely disconnected from reality. Or married couples walking together, holding hands, but each in their own little world, texting other people. I don't understand this. I mean I blog. I use my phone a lot. I use my computer a lot. I like to watch TV, but on my own time. When I'm by myself. When I'm with other people, whether it me a co-worker, or a friend, or my boyfriend. The phone goes in my purse. I leave the sound on, so I can hear every notification, but I just don't feel the need to check my phone every 30 seconds to see who liked my post, or who just texted me, or what the latest trend is. I just don't. 

I know some people get really upset if you don't reply to their texts immediately, but my reasoning is, if you need to get a hold of me that badly, call. I leave my sound on for a reason. If my phone rings, yes, I will pull my phone out, and if I'm not overwhelmingly busy, I will answer. I just don't feel the need to sit and stare at my phone for hours.

Another reason why I love books is that they allow you to use your imagination. Just by reading a few words, I can see the characters and places so vividly in my head the way I want to see them. 

I'm getting a little long winded here, but it makes me sad to see children these days who have never turned a page in their life. Even schools are going digital and electronic. Classics have been banned from school literature. Books like 'The Catcher in the Rye' and to Kill a Mockingbird' are no longer on the shelves of school libraries. Sheltering children from classic literature makes me sad. Those were the books I learned from. Books like 'Lord of the Flies' were the books that taught me just how horrible society can become without structure.

It makes me sad. I just wish they would read. That is all.



C'est la Vie. 

Viva la Vida. 

And Fuck the System.

Peace. 

Signed, Esther Dolezal 🎶🎵

My Resolution

Sometimes, I wonder why things happen the way they do. I guess it's just life. I wonder why people have to be so judgmental of others. Why people are so quick to jump all over someone else for their issues even though we each have our own. Some things really don't concern everyone.
I mean I guess it's human nature. We hate looking at ourselves critically. We know deep down what our faults are, and often project them onto other people, blaming them for the things we dislike about ourselves.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about this new year, and I have decided that instead of generic resolutions that I won't keep, I have resolved to be real with me. To always deal with my personal issues when they arise, and spare others of my internal bullshit. Working on me, because it's time I started focusing on myself, and keeping my nose in my own business.

C'est la Vie.
Viva la Vida.
And Fuck the System.
Peace.
Signed, Esther Dolezal 🎶🎵

So Over Snow

I have decided I am done with snow for this winter. I mean it was awesome that we had a white Christmas in Spokane, but now it's a new year, and now I'm ready for Spring. Or at least to be able to see the sidewalk when I'm walking. I mean snow is pretty, but that's really all it has going for it at this point. And even that is short lived; the snow is starting to look more like cookies 'n' cream ice-cream gone bad. 
I think the whole snow thing is overrated. I mean skiing is fun, and so are winter sports, but I mean, have you ever been beamed in the face with a rock hard snowball? Not fun.
Snow is cold, wet, slippery, and it has this way of hiding things like rocks or curbs that in normal weather could be easily avoided, and then making you lose all footing when you trip over said solid objects, so you end up with a full body bruise.
Also it makes my hair frizz like a bitch.
Pretty much, from November 1st through December 25th snow is great.
After that, I'm so over it.

C'est la Vie.
Viva la Vida.
And Fuck the System.
Peace.
Signed, Esther Dolezal 🎶🎵

New Year. (Hope this one's not a failure too).

Hey guys. Sorry I haven't posted in a while, but I have had a crazy past few months. I can honestly say I've never been happier to see a year come to an end.
I mean seriously... What a year. I'm so glad to be through with 2015.
Not that some of the problems haven't carried over into this year, but I truly hope things are better this year. I say that because some things have a huge potential of going bad. But here's hoping.

So I'm back. Refocused and refreshed, and ready to start a new year.
I hope you all had a wonderful New Year's.

C'est la Vie.
Viva la Vida.
And Fuck the System.
Peace.
Signed,
Esther Dolezal. 🎵🎶

It's Not Over

Sorry I haven't posted in a while, but my life has taken some unexpected turns in the last few months. A lot of family issues, and have occurred in since this summer. The events of this summer are something I'll have to be dealing with for a while in my personal life; and while they are difficult for me to accept and live with day to day, they're something I know will make me stronger. I know I've been silent through most of this, except to give support to my sister, and it was because quite honestly, most of the focus has been on other members of my family.
I know my name has come up very rarely during this scandal, but my part in this is more important than most would think. Now I'm not trying to jump into the spotlight, or get my fifteen minutes of fame, but I need to let you know that there is much more to this story.
The focus of this issue was not to "out" my sister in essence, but something more sinister. Certain members of my family have decided that birthright is more important than justice, and have proved this by bringing hatred and unnecessary judgment on some if their relatives in order to protect their favorites. All the while, blatantly shunning the truth. They have lied in the name of religion, and have proved that they have only ever favored one of us. And to protect this one, they concocted a distraction, to destroy the one thing they knew would exact justice: the credibility of someone who knows, who has seen, and heard,  and has experienced, and would have exposed all of them for what they are.
And while they think they have won, they do not understand that the truth will always win, and justice will reign in the end.
This isn't over yet.